Idk why, but lately I’ve been thinking about you. I dont know what it is, but you seem to be popping into my mind. I’d be lying if I said I didnt miss you. I dont want to tho. I thought by now i would be over you. Its been so long, I kind of feel pathetic for still having some sort of feelings toward you. I think what sucks the most is knowing that your happy. Not that I dont want you to be, but sometimes I look at how happy you are right now and i get jealous. Not that im not happy, but I wish I had what you had. You found someone and you get to move on, while I get to remain lonely. I guess Ive always been jealous of you. You have the looks, all the friends, the guys, everything comes so easily to you. I always wish I had that. I try to tell myself to be content with my life, and most of the time I am, but when I think of you compared to me, it makes me want more.
Recovery is a process. Im slowly starting to get better, but I wish it would go by faster. Im tired of having feelings towards you. I just want to be able to move on. Be like you and just get over it already. I just fear that you’ll be that one person i’ll never forget, never get over. I just pray that isnt true because I dont want to spend the rest of my life wanting something I’ll never have.